The Academy Awards


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Listen, if you’re into effeminate dudes gushing over a millionaire’s wardrobe on some red carpet in Hollywood — that’s cool.

But I’m allowed a few opinions of my own.

One of which would be: Films — are just movies. Motion pictures. It’s ‘award enough’ that the industry deservedly receives $30 from me to watch on the big screen. Honestly, I don’t need to see insiders and big-earners handing out hardware, and pretend like it’s a significant event in the world of art.

I simply don’t get it.

In any case – here are a few thoughts on the 84th annual Academy Awards.

So — Clooney kissed Crystal. Angelina Jolie has thighs. Ellen and JC Penny received the most “paid for” exposure. And it was a big night for HUGO and THE ARTIST.

Sadly, the 84th Academy Awards did NOT get rained out like Sunday’s Daytona 500 — but a tip of the hat goes to Billy Crystal for stating the obvious right off the top; something I’ve been saying for years. With the economic struggles we all face today, nothing lifts our spirits more than watching a bunch of millionaires hand-out trophies to each other.

I haven’t watched this thing in years. In fact, last night Dionne asked if we’d ever watched the Oscars together before – and I don’t think we have.

Truth is, we still haven’t watched the Oscars together.

When I finally woke up – the awards had been over for an hour, and she’d already cranked through two recorded episodes of “Parenthood.”

Now, I could blame it on the Natty Light that accompanied the first 45-minutes of the show – but why point fingers and assign blame? The biggest crime committed here? I am now out of cheap beer for the rain-delayed 54th running of the Daytona 500 today.

Something else to add to my resentment over America’s blind fascination with wealthy people who earn millions — playing pretend for a living.